id be glad to
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
