I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
