You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
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