I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize
