I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
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