She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Randomize
