I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
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The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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