he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
Randomize
