everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
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