ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize
