if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Randomize
