ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
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