sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
25 People Confess The Most Shocking Things They’ve Ever Seen In Public
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...