Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
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