Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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