Texts From Last Night

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  (517): View more from Michigan

  I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.

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  (517): I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house. http://tfl.nu/y6v5
  Replies (9) Good night (1015) Bad night (665)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...

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  (917): All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus... http://tfl.nu/bdby
  Replies (8) Good night (1169) Bad night (1556)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of

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  (910): In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of http://tfl.nu/tguw
  Replies (33) Good night (4972) Bad night (653)
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  (818): View more from California

  I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.

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  (818): I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here. http://tfl.nu/5v02
  Replies (19) Good night (930) Bad night (4978)
• Favorite

  (502): View more from Kentucky

  you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...

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  (502): you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty... http://tfl.nu/96t1
  Replies (4) Good night (691) Bad night (3623)
• Favorite

  (941): View more from Florida

  Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?

  (1-941): View more from Florida

  Wow! You need to get laid.

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  (941): Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits? (1-941): Wow! You need to get laid. http://tfl.nu/yl4s
  Replies (47) Good night (844) Bad night (5988)
• Favorite

  (972): View more from Texas

  I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"

  (1-972): View more from Texas

  More like "Chia Pet"

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  (972): I just named my vagina "The Boneyard" (1-972): More like "Chia Pet" http://tfl.nu/ds7x
  Replies (19) Good night (1049) Bad night (5297)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.

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  (610): all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville. http://tfl.nu/k1x4
  Replies (6) Good night (8330) Bad night (1788)
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  (406): View more from Montana

  What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?

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  (406): What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name? http://tfl.nu/6xxw
  Replies (10) Good night (4663) Bad night (1120)
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  (509): View more from Washington

  They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.

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  (509): They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried. http://tfl.nu/h9l8
  Replies (17) Good night (2233) Bad night (4486)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?

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  (303): How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads? http://tfl.nu/o7ne
  Replies (10) Good night (1755) Bad night (640)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  it's like my freshman wet dream come true

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  (412): it's like my freshman wet dream come true http://tfl.nu/8b08
  Replies (3) Good night (1069) Bad night (492)
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week

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  (770): Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week http://tfl.nu/af2g
  Replies (1) Good night (822) Bad night (348)
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  (260): View more from Indiana

  I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.

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  (260): I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot. http://tfl.nu/vnl1
  Replies (6) Good night (683) Bad night (396)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...

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  (717): Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls... http://tfl.nu/qcx4
  Replies (3) Good night (650) Bad night (375)

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