Texts From Last Night

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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years

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  (303): Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years http://tfl.nu/kvc8
  Replies (6) Good night (628) Bad night (2481)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.

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  (402): giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds. http://tfl.nu/384y
  Replies (57) Good night (4180) Bad night (924)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.

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  (215): you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'. (215): we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk. http://tfl.nu/6wc5
  Replies (27) Good night (6712) Bad night (826)
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building

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  (540): i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building http://tfl.nu/8nc8
  Replies (22) Good night (6093) Bad night (1011)
• Favorite

  (786): View more from Florida

  i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"

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  (786): i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy" http://tfl.nu/v0t3
  Replies (6) Good night (4150) Bad night (965)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.

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  (513): I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again. http://tfl.nu/s5qg
  Replies (9) Good night (1461) Bad night (3518)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.

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  (407): If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life. http://tfl.nu/zp1p
  Replies (11) Good night (922) Bad night (2461)
• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car

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  (925): We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car http://tfl.nu/ofum
  Replies (9) Good night (1867) Bad night (604)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.

  (1-425): View more from Washington

  I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.

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  (425): I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help. (1-425): I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity. http://tfl.nu/3ise
  Replies (4) Good night (1534) Bad night (637)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"

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  (301): And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok" http://tfl.nu/hwnp
  Replies (5) Good night (310) Bad night (591)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more

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  (404): Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more http://tfl.nu/o773
  Replies (8) Good night (612) Bad night (1594)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.

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  (480): I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight. http://tfl.nu/cc82
  Replies (4) Good night (435) Bad night (785)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.

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  (813): I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised. http://tfl.nu/qb0v
  Replies (1) Good night (431) Bad night (239)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult

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  (773): On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult http://tfl.nu/j3ws
  Replies (0) Good night (419) Bad night (235)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.

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  (407): you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest. http://tfl.nu/qs4v
  Replies (10) Good night (949) Bad night (445)

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