Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(765): View more from Indiana

I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.

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(813): View more from Florida

watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide

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(919): View more from North Carolina

Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval

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(850): View more from Florida

tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.

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These 19 Men’s Fashion Mistakes are Unforgivable, According to Women
Read it at the TFLN blog
(914): View more from New York

The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"

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(303): View more from Colorado

I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.

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(602): View more from Arizona

I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight

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(941): View more from Florida

he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"

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(647): View more from Ontario

My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?

(416): View more from Toronto

Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.

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