wakey wakey hands off snakey
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
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