You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Randomize
