thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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