as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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