The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Randomize
