What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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