How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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