Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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