New low: just hacked my moms facebook
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
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