i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Randomize
