ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
