I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Randomize