His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
