i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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