sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
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