no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
Randomize
