Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
