David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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