the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Randomize