it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
My underwear smells like fireworks.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
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