okay pat passed out under dana's car
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize