I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
