Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
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