The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
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