i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
17 of the Dumbest Defenses Heard in Court
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
These 19 Ladies Love Pegging Their Men
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.