2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
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