I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
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sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
then he tried to convert me to islam
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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