dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
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