The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize