Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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