Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
All the doctor said was why
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
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