He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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