You work out of a Hotel?
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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