He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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