he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Randomize
